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Attention campers! Don't forget to listen to the music before you leave here - (click on this)

You've found the place where the Crossfire heats up, neurons implode, the Web Bastard goes wild, and stuff which would ordinarily cause all sorts of personal trouble gets immortalized on the internet by a guy who lucked into finding a cute young female html programmer in 1995. She taught him the codes which allowed him create the web site he had imagined in his mind, and she put it on the internet in 1996, without censoring or complaining. And she had a right to complain! "You would too if it happened to you" (Oh, thank you, Leslie Gore). And the Web Bastard has become the Web Master nowwww . . .

1. The Beatles are the Most Creative Band of All Time

   A definitive review from a professional musician who's been in rock and roll all his life.

2. Led Zeppelin is the #1 Rock and Roll Band of all Time

   Another definitive review from the same man who's been in rock and roll all his life.

3. Jimi Hendrix is the #1 Rock and Roll Star of all Time

   And yet another review from the from the very same guy.

4. My Definition of Rock and Roll

   I came up with one that only uses 9 words to really nail it.

5. Paul McCartney at the 2005 Superbowl

   Paul's Superbowl show was an historic event with important musical implications.

6. They don't make singers like that anymore!

   And it's a good thing too because otherwise, I'd have some stiff competition!

7. On the Nature of Evil

   I've got something important to say here.

8. ALIENS WITH NO BRAINS HAVE REPLACED THE MAJORITY OF THE AMERICAN PEOPLE!

   I've got something important to say here too.

9. The United State of Confusion

   In which a new science of psychological philosophy is explored.

10. The Peter Cross Montage

    A montage is a collection of interesting images that are arranged in such a manner as to be presented on a single page. This one consists of the only existing photographs of me playing in Steam and The Dolphins, as well as Joel Selvin's review of Magic.

11. The Story of My Life

    My official autobiography could very well be the longest web page on the internet.

12. I was at the Original Woodstock

    Yeah, and the Grateful Dead put me to sleep - sorry Deadheads.

13. The Real Meaning of Success

    Is there more to life than what "the lucky people" tell us?

14. The New Formula for Success in the Music Business

    If you have the professional eyes to see and the ears to hear, this one is for you!
    Who are you?

15. Amazon.com is an Excellent Example of Excellence in Business

    The CEO of Starcrost Productions speaks!

16. The Truth About Lawyers

    Want to know what the real name of the game is in court?

17. Damn, I'm Good !

    The confessions of a rock and roll gourmet chef.

18. Honey, I Grew the Plant !

    An experiment in growing my own (personality, that is), and I don't think I broke any Commandment either.

19. The Truth About Sexual Power

    I tell it like it is.

20. Bitch Pampering!

    An obnoxious modern day phenomenon.

21. Good Web Site Design

    Somebody had to step out there and be clear about this important subject, didn't they?

22. Aphorisms and Mental Chatter

    These were begun in 2004 and they were the result of being alone, bored, and having nothing to do but talk "sotto voce" and amuse the self with the self.

23. The 12 Steps to Total Alienation

    If you've ever had any experience with Alcoholics Anonymous and you have a good sense of humor, please proceed. But if you're an AA fanatic stop right here because this is a tongue-in-cheek parody of a very serious subject and it's just my weird tribute to AA combined with my take on the New York City psyche after having been born there, lived there, and had the good fortune to escape from there. AA in Contra Costa County was there for me when I needed the company of some real people.

24. Eczema and Psoriasis- An Inexpensive and Effective Treatment

    Based on a ton of incredibly annoying personal experience.

25. The New 10 Commandments

    Oh, dear Moses, forgive me for I know not what I do!

26. My Original Valentine's Day Card

    I'm a poet, I know it, hope I don't blow it !   (Oh, thank you Mr. Dylan)

27. Roller Derby Star   and "Pat and Joe's"

    These are two of the only songs that I ever recorded which I did not write. Roller Derby Star features me playing drums and also putting my trademark vocal harmonies in the chorus. Pat and Joe's, the flip side, is a nice, smooth and calm instrumental, and it's the only time I was ever recorded playing drums with brushes.

28. Yoga Songs

    I wrote a bunch of "spiritual songs" after I got into yoga and was trying to use my creative energy to express what I thought was God's will for me. Apparently I only recorded four of them and they really were lost until Swami Karunananda found an old cassette tape of them that I had given to her as a present. She had stored it safely for I don't know how many years. She did me a huge favor by saving these and that's not the only wonderful thing she's done for me by a long shot. I think these songs are really quite good and definitely unique. I don't know of any songwriter who has ever taken Sanskrit mantras and used them to create original rock and roll songs.

29. Seminal Songs

    In 2004 I discovered an old unmarked 1/4 track reel-to-reel tape that was stashed in a box of music memorabilia. It turned out to be 11 songs written by me when I was a teenager. These songs are seminal in nature (like musical seminal fluid) and although they were recorded very poorly by me on a cheap quarter track machine while I was trying to sing and play either piano or guitar at the same time, a few of the songs are really quite good. They illustrate developing songwriting talent (which could conceivably be of interest to someone other than me someday).

30. Endless

    This song was The Dolphins' follow-up record to Surfing East Coast and it's the first time I ever played drums on a record. The song was written by Tor Pinney, my old friend from sixth grade, and I still really like Brian Kelly's cute keyboard intro, the way the chords modulate upwards with Tor, Roy's and Brian's harmonies increasing dynamically with them, and the overall catchiness of the song. I also like the driving force of the drummer who you can hardly hear in the mix.

31. Song Titles in Search of a Song

    If you believe this one, then I have some beautiful ocean front property in Nevada that you'll REALLY be interested in!

32. Lost Songs

    These are songs which either were recorded and the recordings were lost, or which were never recorded at all. They're up here because the lyrics are interesting, although it's without the music which only I know now.

33. Seminal Poetry plus One

    Before I ever started writing songs, I was writing poetry and I think I began doing that when I was about 11. I began setting my poetry to music when I was about 15 and my first decent songs are in the Seminal Song collection above. The first poem is really quite a classic which I wrote in 1995 and posted to the intenet immediately thereafter on an anger poetry web site. The rest of these poems are up here simply because it's my web site and I get to have this kind of fun with myself whenever I want to. I severely doubt whether anybody will ever read these pages.