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Line Dancing Fool

I was sittin' on a pity pot thinking that my life was really shot
I wandered into the Cowboy Country Club and what I heard was really hot
The beat was rock and roll, but the singer had a country drawl
People were lined up wall to wall, they were doin' the Watermelon Crawl
Well I felt like a bit of a klutz, you should have seen my Stray Cat Struts
Now I feel like a million bucks
I feel like a million bucks
I feel like a million bucks - whoa . . .   shucks!

I'm just a line dancing fool, line dancing fool
Cajun country cool, from a New York City school
I'm just a line dancing fool, line dancing fool
Golly I believe it's true, Dolly, I'm gonna meet you!

Well I fell in love with Elvira, then I fell for Norma Jean
And the girls in shirts and skirts and boots were the prettiest sight I'd seen
So I went to a country western store, bought boots and shirts and pants
Got a cowboy hat and a fat leather belt with a buckle that says "LET"S DANCE"
Now I feel like a million bucks
I feel like a million bucks
I feel like a million bucks - whoa . . .   shucks!

I'm just a line dancing fool, line dancing fool
Cajun country cool, from a New York City school
I'm just a line dancing fool, line dancing fool
I'm hot as a pistol, good shot I'm gonna meet you Crystal !

Jim Carrey to the left, now double to the right
Jump up in the air, tear out your hair, oh you're a terrible sight !
If you feel like a bit of a nerd, just flip the world the bird
Do you feel like a million bucks?
Do you feel like a million bucks?
Do you feel like a million bucks - say it!   Shucks!

We're just line dancing fools, we're line dancing fools
Everybody stomp like a pack of mules, say "line dancing rules"
We're all line dancing fools, we're line dancing fools
Break up all the rules, shake up the family jewels!

Peter Cross is the songwriter, the lead singer and he also sings all the harmony tracks, plus he's the arranger and the producer.

Commentary:

In June of 1995 I was divorced, lonely, pathetic and miserable. Some friends from the Second Chance divorce group were telling me that I ought to get out, have some fun and meet new people. Cursed by the demon of rock and roll, I was unable to bear the sound of disco garbage, rap/crap/hip hop or techno noise without vomiting, and I'm still allergic to most of what I hear on the radio. I exit a club faster than Superman when they play Brick House or Play That Funky Music White Boy. So I drove 15 miles south to the Cowboy Country Club to try line dancing. I went out line dancing three times per week but I couldn't remember the steps from one day to the next and I didn't connect with any women or make friends with anybody. However somewhere inside me, the experience gelled into a fairly clever autobiographical song that is barbed with a plethora of dangerously sharp lyrical and musical hooks.

2004 update:   I now own that one of a kind fat leather belt with a big silver buckle that says "Let's Dance" across the top. It also says "Starcrost Productions" across the bottom and in the center, there's an embossed gold figure of a cowboy riding a bucking bull. Considering all the bull I've had to put up with in my life, I think the bucking bull symbol is totally appropriate.

The immortal soul of rock and roll
Peter is the singer standing up at the mic on the left


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Music, lyrics, text, and web page design copyright 1996 © Peter Cross